London is the Reason: Navigating Grief and Loss in Surrogacy

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In this deeply moving episode of the Life, Loss, and Motherhood Podcast, Vallen Webb sits down with Kristin McQuaid, founder of the nonprofit London is the Reason. Kristin shares her powerful journey of loss and resilience as an intended parent who tragically lost her daughter London at 39 weeks through surrogacy. Together, they discuss the profound impact of grief on both intended parents and surrogate mothers, highlighting the need for a compassionate community and tailored support for those facing infant loss.

Kristin’s story underscores the complexities of grief in surrogacy, where emotions like guilt, anger, and sorrow intertwine for both the surrogate and intended parents. After realizing the lack of resources available for intended parents, Kristin was driven to create London is the Reason, a nonprofit dedicated to supporting families through healing boxes and community initiatives. This conversation sheds light on the importance of grief support in hospitals, connecting those who’ve experienced similar losses, and the power of purposeful support systems in aiding emotional recovery.

Key Takeaways:

• Grief Support in Surrogacy: There’s a significant gap in support for intended parents and surrogate mothers experiencing infant loss, highlighting the need for specialized resources.
• Healing Through Purpose: Kristin founded London is the Reason to honor her daughter’s memory and help others through tangible grief support.
• Emotional Complexity of Loss: Grieving can bring up a range of emotions, including guilt, anger, and longing, and Kristin emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to process these feelings.
• Healing Boxes: A unique approach to offering comfort, healing boxes provide grieving parents with tools and items to aid in emotional healing.
• Community as a Healing Tool: Connecting with others who’ve faced similar losses is vital for mental health and emotional resilience.
• Role of Hospitals in Grief Support: Kristin advocates for better grief support systems within healthcare, offering families immediate resources and the right connections for their healing journey.

Chapters:

• [00:00] – Introduction to Grief and Surrogacy
• [02:24] – The Journey of Loss and the Need for Support
• [10:31] – Understanding the Impact of Loss on Intended Parents
• [18:18] – The Importance of Creating a Support Network
• [22:28] – Finding Purpose in Loss
• [29:51] – A New Journey Begins
• [35:08] – Embracing New Life and the Healing Process
• [39:23] – Navigating Grief: Support for Surrogates and Intended Parents
• [42:45] – Healing Boxes: A Unique Approach to Grief Support
• [46:36] – Finding the Right Support: The Importance of Connection
• [50:11] – The Role of Hospitals in Grief Support Systems
• [54:52] – How Loss Impacts Parenting and Personal Growth
• [01:00:19] – Living with Loss: Gaining a New Perspective on Life

Learn more about Kristin and London Is The Reason, below.

https://www.londonisthereason.org/ways-to-give

We have a few low-cost products on Amazon that you can use on your healing journey.

• Our Pregnancy Loss Affirmation Coloring Book, HERE.
• Our Pregnancy Loss Journal with writing prompts, HERE.
• Letter to My Baby in Heaven, HERE.
• Cute & Spooky Halloween Coloring Book, HERE.
• Fall Hygge Coloring Book, HERE.

Download your BEST LIFE PDF GUIDE, HERE!!!

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Sending love,

Vallen & the EJ Team